Dear blogging friends.
First let me say that you all are the nicest, most kind, caring and considerate people on this earth.
Thank you for all your thoughtful comments, emails, phone calls and most of all thank you for lifting me and my family up in prayer.
These last 2 weeks have been difficult, I've been down spiritually and mentally.
Some days the answering machine sat blinking and unanswered, I just didn't want to talk.
My strawberry crop went mostly unpicked. I just didn't have the heart to do much.
Baby Daisy isn't coming home, I am heart broken by this, but I have some peace of knowing what happened and where. Not all involved are being totally honest so I may never know the truth. At least I am not looking everywhere for her or sleeping out on the day bed on the porch listening for her howl.
Some things I have made peace with. You have too or you'll go crazy.
Our friend Bill is still with us and has even been out to the hay fields this past week. He is sick and weak, but still has a smile on his face when you tell him something and he even tries to crack a joke or two about his imminent situation to try and cheer those around him. He is such a blessing.
I feel like things are looking up, I am not consumed by grief and sadness, just have spontaneous bouts most days. The silliest things will set it off.
I missed my first horse show of the year with Bug, I was too upset to even care at the moment.
I am back training daily with her and hope to make our debut soon, she is such a great horse.
The other dogs seem to be getting back to them selves again. They moped for a week and laid around unsure why there dynamics had changed. Poor little Ringo had never known life without her sister.
I think my heart ached the most for them. They have resumed hunting and playing and dragging things around and chewing. Ozzy, (Baby Daisy's dad) has been by my side since the day she disappeared.
He slept with me all those nights on the porch and is now my constant shadow. He is trying so hard to fill the void he senses. Most nights he snuggles with his head on my legs while I watch TV.
He is such a good dog too.
I've been trying to stay busy, they say that's best.
I helped my husband build a small pool deck around our above ground pool.
For three years I've been getting in with the rickety old pool ladder. I also found some pool steps on craigslist for cheap.
Now with steps and a deck I feel right up town. I'm going to try and move some plants around this week and get it landscaped somewhat.
The Amish kids painted all the pipe rail fence. It looks nice and soooo glad it's done.
Still working on getting Ele and water to the new barn.
We unloaded and stacked about 425 small bales of alfalfa hay......not my favorite thing to do.
Cleaning house, mowing, and that's about it.
We did sell 2 of the project horses and Dwight moved 5 others to summer pasture so that's a lot less for me to feed and move around each day.
My baby boy turns 21 tomorrow...where did the time go????
That's me and what I've been up too. A whole lot of nothin'.
I have been blog visiting when time allows, I do so enjoy keeping up with you all.
Everyone is such an inspiration to me and thank you again for carrying me through.
In peace and grace,
Shanda
